oh look what you've done, you've made a fool of everyone

How to start a post so full of drama! I know, I'll start by saying that my Phish Food eating record has slowed down to a measly 3 minutes per tub, but I'm practising. believe me, I'm practising...
I think I should do this quick and painful, like ripping off a plaster (you know, I've never actually had that much pain from plasters, maybe it's a british thing?), but on second thoughts, I'm going to drag it out and make it as painful for you as it was for me because that's the only way to make a post out of it!

CIB and I were serious up until a week ago, when we broke up. I would never have even thought that we would break it off so soon, but CIB obviously had other plans.
Everything was going really great (according to me, at least), we would take turns going to each others flats, he would surprise me after a long day of work with some thai buffet, candles and flowers, we took a trip to the lake district together over one weekend! Towards the end of last month, about a week before he broke up with me, he 'got really swamped at work', and Eva (do you remember her! Wow, it's been so long!) and I became close like we were when we were mere 14 year olds, while Pops and I grew apart. She became really irritable around me and she would always scoff when CIB and I ever had any PDA moments while she was around, so I kind of ignored all her negative behaviour while CIB and I were getting serious and Eves and I were going out together.
One night, Eves, Pops and I were supposed to go out for drinks in Camden so Pops and I could do some bonding, but she felt really ill, so it was just Eves and I. About an hour into hour night, my feet absolutely killed, so after a gruelling half hour waiting for/being on the tube to get home, I come home to see Pops lying on the couch. No, she wasn't dead, something much worse.
CIB was on top of her.
And they were kissing.
On the sofa.

Jesus, I really... I'm not really sure how to say this. It's been really hard for me, I mean, Pops was my best friend. And I had no idea that CIB was doing thigns with other girls, let alone my best friend. What kind of boyfriend does that???

This all happened... 10 days, 2 hours and a half ago.
I haven't talked to Pops since. I can't even look at her, we're flatmates so I'm not just doing it for dramatic affect, I really find it hard to wake up at 8 in the morning and walk into your kitchen in your underpants to see your best friend... or whatever she is now standing there in her underpants making tea. It doesn't hit me at first, and then I realise that CIB has probably seen her in her underpants as well, my ex-boyfriend saw her in her underpants while he was still my boyfriend, and she thinks she can just walk around and make tea and read magazines and go to work every day like nothing has happened?? I dont see or hear her apologising to me, which just makes it even worse. I know her, and I know that she does this. She doesn't talk, she hates confrontation, but how can you do that? Just ignore me? I'm the one doing the ignoring, what the fuck is wrong with her??

Basically, I've called sick from work for the next week, so I'll be in the flat at all times, and because of this, I've bought some provisions-

about 3 pairs of these silly overpriced sweatpants from American Apparell (I'm also adding pictures so you can just soak up all that's just been said. Usually I dont do pictures, I've only ever done one post with pictures of clothes, and the rest are all food pictures. Mmm... food)

about 5 tubs of Phish Food ice cream- what else?

pretty much every fashion and gossip magazine I could find at the magazine stall around the corner, because when I'm not crying or eating, I've got to find something to occupy me so I dont cry or... eat

Movies! of course Sainsbury's had some silly '£3 for 4 movies' thing going on, so I bought...
emplyee of the month (I couldn't help myself, it was on sale!)

the baz luhrman romeo and juliet, finally! I've been meaning to buy that for months now

the notebook, of course!

and moulin rouge, but there will be more movie buying to come, I assure you

I also bought some wifebeaters from AA, just because £22 really is a small price to pay for a bit of stringy ribbed fabric to complete my whole slob look

Now, I know myself like.... i cant think of a funny thing to put here so instead I'll just say that I know myself, and for half this week I'm going to be slobbing around crying and being fat, and for the other half I'm going to be trying to get slim and sexy and cleaning up a bit, so I've made a handy dandy shopping list for when that time comes, I thought I'd share it with you...

heels, lots of them. I still have this £100 voucher from shelly's- which is literally opposite the U.O, so that means about a 40 second walk from the flat, so people will only see me in my horrible, stained wifebeater wearing state for around that time until I make it into the shelter of Shelly's... I guess I'll have to avoid Pops though

a new purse! It's summer so I think I might get me one of those see-through baggies, they have some really cute ones in Nine West right now I think

that fake tan cum moisturiser thing

a whole bunch of body shop products, namely- shampoo, conditioner, henna for my hair (I'm going to try dark brown and I want to do it naturally), body wash, a loofa, sun screen, some more lip balm

shorts galore! I really need me some cute denim shorts from miss sixty, and there are some v. v. nice city-ish shorts in the U.O that I can get with my staff discount (yay!)

cute rain mac thing. rain mac is the ugly word for it... I want something waterproof. In jacket form

basically a lot of summer clothes

flip flops

a new pair of jeans (wow, this list is getting bigger than I originally thought)

a hair cut, I'm so bored with this shoulder length straight-ness right now

a manicure and pedicure

and that's it I think!

I'll probably post again tomorrow, maybe a bit later, you know, if I find the time between eating half my body weight in ice cream and crying out half my body weight in tears... oooh, then I'd weigh zero stone! sounds appealing...

Anyway, until then, bye my lovelies!

Phish Food, not Fish Food

I've come to realise that a lot of people don't actually know what Phish Food ice cream is! (Yes, I spelt it 'Phish PHood' in the last post, but i've realised my errors now)

Some think that it is in fact a tub of fish food, others refuse to accept it's existence.

I'm here to tell you about Phish Phood, and why it's brilliant.

To your left you will see exhibit a) The ice cream.

Below this peice of text you will see exhibit b) The description

(fron the Ben and Jerry's website itself!) 'Chocolate ice cream with marshmellow, caramel swirls and fish shaped chocolate chunks'.

I admit, I need to go on a rant about the brilliance of phish food, and I'm going to fulfill that urge.

I remeber discovering Phish Food 2 years ago, in my alcoholic state. It was summer, I was at Eve's house (we didn't know Pop's back then) and we had just drunk two bottles of pimms without the lemonade, and we felt like having a substantial snack. so we raided her freezer, ate some frozen pees and saw the tub of Phish Food. Clearly neglected, it was a month past it's sell by date and the plastic thing around the top of the tub (I'm making a lot of this up, I was too drunk to remember what exactly happened, but give me some artistic liscence. this is a blog, for christ's sake.), so we took some spoons (two, to be precise) and dug in.

We ate the whole tub in a tree in her back garden (I remember that), and I had such bad brain freeze mixed with drunkness that I fell off into a pile of stinging nettles (I also remembered that. who wouldn't?).

I'll never forget that day. It's now my favourite ice cream, and like I said before, I can eat a whole tub in 2 minutes and 29 seconds exactly. I haven't done it in a while, my time might be slower. I'll have to go out and get some ice cream and a stop watch, I'll update you with the times every once ina while.

On with the show.

You're probably wondering where CIB (cute indie boy, god, has it been that long that you can't even remember?) has gone, well he hasn't gone far, I've got him wrapped around my little finger.

We've even gone out to dinner! Which I take as a good thing. we went to Carluccios and he had the chicken and lemon risotto, I had the mushroom pasta and we shared a bottle of wine. and went out for drinks afterwards. and then he stayed at mine. Don't worry, we didn't get anywhere past 2nd base, and we haven't. It's only been a week. God, I'm not that much of a skank.

I might ot be posting for a while after this, I'm having a bit of a crisis with the flat, we might get evicted if we're not careful. So, yeah.