Tuesday, February 27, 2007

out of order

It's been such a long time since I've posted, and I sincerely apologise. Me and CIB have gotten all serious, and APG and I are friends although he doesn't know whether or not to go back to chicago.
Anyway, I've been terribly busy, and I don't think I'll be doing any posts for a while.
I'll probably return... I'd say in May or June, so check back when those months come around!
It's been fun and pretty short, but I promise I'll be back
xxx Holly

Thursday, February 15, 2007


First I would just like to say thanks to all of you that care so much about my life. So many people have given me advice about CIB and APG, so thankyou for all that.
Me and CIB have only met up once since he asked me to be his girlfriend and it was in valentines day. I don't usually celebrate these days that are just set up by Hallmark to make abitof extra cash, but this is the first time i've had a boyfriend for valentines for too long. He took me to see another indie band and he did say who they were but to tell you the truth I was so busy just staring into his gorgeous eyes that I can't remember anything he said. Except for that he loves me! Yes folks, I really am in love with CIB, and as I haven't seen APG for quite a while i'm just going to think of him as a friend, only a friend and nothing more.
So, what else is new?
Well, I got some gorgeous shoes free from urban outfitters because the heel had broken, but Pops took them into work (she works at Shellys if I haven't mentioned that before) and someone she knows there fixed them, and now they're as good as new. They're not on the website but they are purple patent and extremely high. I love them.
Oh, another exciting thing is that after after just over two weeks i've been able to drop my job at Macdonalds and i'm just working longer hours at the U.O so that's all cool.
cheerio for now, i'll keep you posted on CIB.

ps. for valentines day he bought me a bunch of roses.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

I just don't know what to do with myself

I took molly's advice and attempted whipping CIB into shape last night, to save me from writing anything truly horrific in my confused state, I'll just do the roleplay here.

Me- What happened on that date last time?

CIB- Nothing

Me- Listen, if you don't want to go out with me or you want to go out with someone else then just tell me because I could just be wasting my time on you and I could be doing a lot better.


CIB- Will you be my girlfriend?

Me- What?

CIB- You know, like proper

Me- But you don't like me

CIB- what? of course I like you, I just asked you to be my girlfriend

Me- Oh

cue big sloppy kiss.

I'm so confused, I said yes in the end because I seriously like him, but what about APG?? I know some people said that I should go for him and I was contemplating it, almost hoping that CIB would say, 'no sorry, I don't like you whatsoever, please leave and get yourself another guy'. Ok, that was the crappest sentence on the face of the earth.
Anyway, I just don't know what to doooo. ARGH.
Well, obviously I can't do much cos I'm CIB's girlfriend (Oh gosh, I feel so restricted) now, and what the hell will I tell APG? We're going out for drinks tonight. But just as friends. I should tell him that I'm CIB's girlfriend. But then maybe he'd think that I was assuming that he was interested romantically in me, which I do, but maybe he thought he was being subtle and stuff.
bloody hell.
Going out with CIB wednesday night, I think he's taking me to a roller disco, he did buy me some skates. But maybe he's just weird. I'll let you know how things go with APG.

Friday, February 9, 2007

OH MY GOD. it's too serious to think of an inventive title

I have terrible news, well it's not too terrible if you think about it. in fact it's quite good news.
Ok, I have good and bad news. As in good and bad at the same time.
I met someone, his name... We'll call him APG- arty preppy guy. I know it's a strange combination but he wears really cute glasses and shirts from Paul Smith (I'm always falling for the rich ones, and don't even ask me how I know the shirt's Paul Smith. Alright, it had the logo on it.) but he owns an art gallery in chicago, yes, chicago as in chicago in america which is a billion gazillion miles from here but he says he's trying his luck getting his gallerys into London.
Although I'm dating CIB, APG is so nice to me and texted me this morning saying that the sun's out, even though it wasn't, and he doesn't seem like the kind of guy to like really crap indie music and act shifty on dates even though I'm falling for CIB and I'm falling even harder because of this whole 'playing hard to get' thing even though it's probably not intentional and he could go and break my heart any second now whereas APG would probably bury his own cat alive if he made me cry.
That was a very long and confusing sentence but I'm delirious with loving CIB and hating him at the same time and I think that APG is in love with me because I've been seeing him wait outside Urban Outfitters when my shift ends and he always waves at me and then looks like he's about to come over and talk to me but he never did until yesterday.
He even took me out for drinks. Oh god, I feel terrible, does that count as cheating? We didn't kiss or anything but we like, talked.
This is so confusing. I've never dated multiple people, and I don't want to start now, I mean I haven't even turned 19 yet (2 months today people, in case anyone was thinking of buying a chloé dress for me) and I've only ever had one serious relationship.
To drown my sorrows I'm going to do this survey that I copied from www.alarmclockcatastrophe.blogspot.com

1. You have $10 and need to buy snacks at a gas station, what do you get?
Mcoys, but on ly the real ones, except no immitations. Also, diet lucozade, but they don't make that so normal lucozade will do.
2. If you had to be reincarnated as some sort of sea dwelling creature, what would you be?
It's a tie between a whale and a mermaid. If I was a mermaid i'd look normal, if i was a whale i wouldn't be eaten by anything. Apart from the Japanese. No offence to the Japanese. I'm Asian too.
3. Who's your favorite Redhead?
My Ex-boyfriend, who I am still on very good terms with. George.
4. What do you order when you're at an IHOP?
What the hell's an IHOP? Is that some kind of excuse for TGI fridays. You don't know how many times I've said 'thank god it's friday' there. seriously. thank god it's friday NOW. I'm not even in a TGI fridays. Oh my god, the deliriousness has kicked in again.
5.Last book you read?
The Devil Wears Prada.
6. Have you made out with anyone on your friends list?
I don't really keep a list of my friends. But if I did I would have made out with all of them. Seriously.
7. Describe your favorite pair of underwear?
French Knickers from Topshop designer lingerie. Not just any lingerie, designer lingerie. I got them for Christmas from George, ahh george.
8. Describe the last time you were injured?
This morning I whacked my hand really hard on our kitchen counter. Not to mention my heart's been breaking ever since CIB didn't call me back.
9. Of all your friends, with whom would you want to be stuck in the middle of a jungle?
Chloé and Francis. It's a tie, they both have black belts in Karate.
10. Are there any odd things that make you feel uncomfortable?
Odd things? Well, It was pretty odd and uncomfortable making when Sarah and Francis started making out at this party we went to. That was very odd.
11. Are there any weird things that turn you on?
The smell of cheesey feet is SOOO sexy. Um, no, not particularily. I feel like I'm pretty normal with the things that excite me. ahem.
12. What is the wallpaper on your cell phone?
A picture of me and Pete Doherty at Glastonbury 2 years ago. I won a free backstage pass with Radio1!!
13. Soda?
Is that even a question?
14. Flavor of pudding?
um, i like many kinds of puddings including ice cream or brownies or cake or WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN.
15. What type of shirt are you wearing?
A black t-shirt from Urban Outfitters that has a drawing of Twiggy on it and says 'Twiggy'
16. Prescription medication?
Not that I'm aware of. And seriously, is that actually a question. How am I supposed to tell what you mean by 'prescription medication?'. That could mean, 'What is your favourite prescription medication?' or 'Do you want some prescription medication?'. So as far as I'm concerned, this question doesn't mean anything to me. I take back the answer that I wrote before.
17. If you could use only one form of transportation for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Bus, but only if it's the old double deckers that London used to have. The new one's are totally anti-short people. Have you seen how high the step is?
20. What are you listening to right now?
The Cure, as always
21. Most recent movie you've watched in a theater?
I don't go to the theatre because I don't have the time, but the absolute last one was The History Boys
22. If you could invent one thing, what would it be?
An invention machine so I could invent anything I wanted. Clever, yes?
23. Name a teacher you had the hots for?
My violin teacher, he was really fat but I couldn't tell at the time, only because I was kind of chubby too. And when I say chubby I mean bordering on clinically obese. Not really. But really. But not. God damn deliriousness...
24. What's your favorite town?
25. Favorite kind of cake?
Brownie cake, made out of brownies all smooshed together with hersheys chocolate sauce. And you just put your hands in there and then smear it all over your face and lick it off. It's actually a good face mask.
26. What's the first word that comes to mind right now?
Artypreppyguyandcuteindieboy. all one word.
29.What did you have for dinner LAST NIGHT?
Oh, venturing off into capitals now are we? well I'll just have to say I HAD CHICKEN KIEV.
31. What's the last thing you said out loud?
33. Look to your left, what do you see?
A wall. Beige wall paper. Lovely and peely. And a the cure poster. When i say poster i mean a 1 inch by 1 inch photo so no one would notice it there. I'm at work.
34. Who is the last person who spent $100 on you?
Um, No one. ever.
35. Go into your text message log on your phone ... the last text you received?
From APG saying 'it's sunny'. That was a long time ago.
36. What's the last piece of clothing you bought?
The last time I bought clothes was when I wasn't in debt. So I think it was that orange dress from Urban Outfitters that I wore on my first date with CIB.
37. If you could be alone with anyone right now who would it be?
WHY? The purpose of this survey was to drown my sorrows about wanting two different men. God damn you you stupid thing.
38. What do you look for physically in a partner?
Being APG. I mean CIB. Oh god.
39. What's the saddest thing that's happened to you?
Being chucked (not literally, although that would have increased the sad-factor) out of my house was pretty sad. The letter I got from my parents in rehab saying that I was being chucked out of my house was probably the saddest part. And also the lack of cute people in rehab kind of made my sadness increase.
40. What is your motto in life?
If it's hard, it's not worth doing. no, that's like my anti-motto. If there was such a thing as an anti-motto then that would be it. It's totally my anti-motto. You get the point.

Tuesday, February 6, 2007

The weather outside is frightful

Covent Garden must be a freezer in it's spare time or something, it's actually freezing in the flat. I'm really wrapped up in flannel pj's and a hoodie, and of course some slippers that are basically a piece of duvet with crap soles and a tie at the top, only £3 from h&m, and I swear to someone that my toes are turning blue.
I didn't talk about the girls night in on saturday, which is rather forgetful, it was on my list of things to do (mentally).
Pops wasn't there, she said work needed her for overtime (and I hope she's getting paid for it), so Eves and I watched our favourite movie- legally blonde-and read the words out loud along with elle. God, if I wasn't so asian then I'd definately be her. We ate so much ice cream, and we put on a playlist of happy music and danced around the flat. It was really fun. It's a shame Pops wasn't there, I could have called up pretending to be her doctor saying- 'she has boringitis, she can't be around boring work and boring people for more than the regulated hours. now let her come back home and eat ridiculous amounts of crap and watch movies with her best friends. Thankyou very much'.

Due to the crap weather conditions, I've been searching for the perfect jumper. Topshop jumpers are really quite stupid because most of them are 3/4 sleeves or full of holes or really thin, none of them are PRACTICAL.

of course, urban outfitters and it's seemingly endless supply of hoodies had something ridiculously priced on it's website that might not shrink in the wash-

Bird Print Hoody, £35

You can always count on Paul&Joe sister, but that's only if you have bottomless pockets or aren't still kind of in debt.

anyway, got a date with CIB on Sunday, i'm hoping by then I wont have this wretched cold :(

it's 10pm now, so I've got to go to bed, so I'm sorry for the short post, I just feel like such a terrible blogger, neglecting my blog all the time!

Monday, February 5, 2007

I would just like to start by saying, i am so sorry for being such a crap blogger and not keeping you guys up to date. It's just the last week or so has been a jumble of working and trying to keep C.I.B interested, you know texting him in my lunch breaks and so on.
Well, I kind of feel that all that texting has been abit of a waste, which I will explain about in a minute. I just want to let you all to know that we are not being chucked out of our apartment! yes yes yes! We all worked as much as possible, cut down on buying stuff and borrowed here and there. We are on our way out of debt.
So, back to C.I.B. Me and him went on a date last night, and at the beginning it felt so good to see him again. We went to another thing at barflyand the music was abit shit but he is gorgeous and it all seemed to be going fine. But at roughly 11 o'clock he got a text and after that he started acting kind of shifty and jumpy. Like, I asked him what he' been doing yesterday (just to, you know, make conversation) and he answered me so quickly, without looking at me once. I can tell that there's something he's not telling me. Of course, like any girl would be, i'm worried he might be cheating on me, but i'm not saying that's definately it. Still i've been messed around by guys so much that I wouldn't be suprised if he was seeing someone else.

Oh god, what am I going to do?